there's a nu(de) burger sheriff in town

So, I decided today that I suck at everything. I went bowling last night, after hearing that some dude in Ohio was able to bowl a perfect 900. Three perfect games in a row. That is the bowling equivalent to, say a baseball player throwing a no-hitter, hitting for the cycle, and smacking a game-winning grand slam -- all in the same game. It's just unbelievable focus to be able to throw 12 perfect strikes in a row for a perfect 300, then turning around and doing it again.. twice! Dude is God of Ohio now.

So, yeah.. this was all running through my mind as I got up for the first frame. I got one pin down on the left side, and then proceeded to leave that frame open and eight others. Shit.

Changing my name on the board from pbrchx to unibowler didn't help much either. My score. 94 points. To paraphrase Bode Miller, bowling is hard to do when you've been drinking. Oh wait. No, I got that backwards. The only thing that would make bowling harder is acid. But then again, I'm sure Dock Ellis would challenge that notion.

Anyway.

So, licking my wounds today, I decided to try my hand at cooking these fine vegetarian shittake/truffel mushroom burgers. They smelled so good on the grill, and I went inside and got my pita bread ready. Back outside, and these very promising culinary delights were charred to a crisp. Damn it.

This burger emperor wears no clothes.